Sometimes you just have to start

Plans…… I’ve made a lot of plans, some better than others, a few great ones and a laundry list of ones that never made it past being scribbles on the back of envelope or gas receipt. And if I’m being honest, which is also a goal I’ve set for myself in my writing, (I’ll explain that statement in a minute) most of my life has been a reaction, not the execution of a well laid out plan.

Back to the honesty statement. My natural tendency is to keep people at arms length (or farther) away and I mean that in every possible way. I’m not a hugger, I don’t share my feelings well and I play it pretty close to the vest when it comes to personal information. Whether this happened intentionally or as a reaction isn’t completely clear to me..yet. What I do know is that I limit my exposure to uncomfortable topics, which is most of them, by steering my interactions and conversations with others. I do this by asking questions and shifting the focus onto them, which most people enjoy so it works out well for everyone. When I am asked a question I will typically deflect it by giving some generic response, making a joke or by answering a question with a question. If I had to put a number on it I’d guess that 80% of my interactions with people are somewhat disingenuous.

That’s going to change.

I’ve toyed with the idea of putting pen to paper ever since my daughter was born. I thought a journal would be a great way to capture moments and revisit them with her later. A real time accounting of her life, the good and bad that could be looked back on without the emotion of the moment. We could talk about how we each remember the events and what they meant then vs now as we look at it through older eyes. Well, it’s been 23 years and after a few failed attempts, here we are. The final nudge came from a last minute trip to visit my Aunt and Uncle in Florida. Uncle Bill is my Dad’s only sibling and I hadn’t seen him since my wedding 13 years ago. Remember that whole “ keep everyone at arms length” thing I like to do? Perfect example. My wife and I along with my daughter Carissa and her fiance Chance spent 3 days with Aunt Pam and Uncle Bill and had an amazing visit. Filled mostly with stories of when we were growing up and would get together for Holidays or visits in the summer. It’s a family tradition that “visits” translates to projects, building a barn, building fence,etc, always a to-do list.I think, in part, because i t minimizes the amount of time you had to talk to each other on any significant level. But this trip was different, it evolved into stories about his childhood growing up in Kansas with my Dad, his time in the Marines and his life as a husband and father. I learned so much! It was then that I decided it’s time. I don’t have a solid plan….yet. What I do know is that some things are so important, so meaningful that sometimes you just have to start.

In order to make progress but still keep one foot in my comfort zone I’ve decided to take you on a journey with me through the process of building a house...or two.

I’ve worked in the construction field in one capacity or another for 30 years so I’m fairly comfortable in that world and it’s my hope that I can draw comparisons between the process of building a home and the process of putting my story into words. What makes these two homes special is that they are the manifestation of everything that came before. All the plans, all missteps, all the intentional acts and what can only be described as serendipity at its best.

The first house will be the smaller of the two, designed to be a Mother-in-law cottage which we will live in while we build the dream home. Pat, Becky’s mom will then move onto the property with us and live within walking distance. She’s 82 and in relatively good health so she will have her independence but be close if she needs anything. Did I mention we have sold our current home and have to have the first home move-in ready in 90 days? Point of reference, we broke ground yesterday….. I guess that means we’re down to 89days.

There will be real time updates on the build, snapshots of the never dull “ day in the life” of the Iowa Kobelt’s. On most days we are one monkey short of a circus around here. And the occasional trip down memory lane.

My hope is to publish at least once a week. I’m not completely sure if that will be a Blog, an email, morse code or smoke signals. Not the most detailed plan I've ever had but definitely one of the most important ......sometimes you just have to start.