Becky and I made a day trip to see my daughter Carissa and her husband Chance today. They, in true Kobelt fashion, decided to sell their house, get a new puppy (Benji) and move to a brand new town a couple hours away. It wasn’t totally impulsive. Chance was offered a promotion with the company he works for which will require him to work out of the main office back in Cedar Rapids. His job is what took them to North Central Iowa a year and a half ago where they bought their first house and were really enjoying their new life together. But the opportunity to take on a new challenge lured them back to the Cedar Rapids area.
They did a lot of work to their first house on Anderson street. They finished the basement, fenced the backyard, painted every room (some rooms twice), a ton of yard work and landscaping, new lighting fixtures, you get the idea. It was all a labor of love. So leaving it was a mixed bag of emotions I’m sure.
They have decided, wisely I think, to rent initially so they can take some time to find their next home. Let Chance settle into his new role, get the lay of the land and have time to research school districts for those grand kids that may be on the horizon, wishful thinking on my part I suppose. But that puts them in a weird place. The rental is less of a house than the one they left. Carissa is taking some time to unpack and homie the place up (she’s painting again, her absolute least favorite thing) before starting her search for a new job. So the totality of the experience has her feeling like they are starting over.
I can totally relate to how she’s feeling.
When I finished the 87 day sprint of building the “efficiency house” I felt good. Tired, but good. Then we rolled right into building the dream house and I have to be honest with you, I haven’t enjoyed it the same way. Which is why there was a 30 day absence in my Blog. I felt like I had worked very hard, very purposefully and was happy with the result of my efforts. So why on earth would I start over again?
Well, I, just like my dear daughter, could use a smig of perspective from time to time.
As we were driving home today I kept thinking about where I was in my life at 24. I’m not sure what the statute of limitations is, so I’m not gonna get into specifics but let’s just say they are light years ahead of where I was. I am so amazed and impressed with the maturity, self awareness and humility they both possess. Yes, the situation may feel overwhelming right now and the path to “victory” may not be as clear as one would like. But understand this, my dear. We are cut from the same cloth, you and I. The things that frustrate us are the very things that fuel us.
We like a good challenge, we need them to grow. When things get easy, we get bored. That’s why the little house on Anderson Street looked so good when you left. And yes it was hard to leave but you’re not starting over, you’re moving on. On to the next challenge, the next chance to grow and learn, to define and refine who you are.
The old saying, “You can’t see the forest for the trees” is true sometimes. And this is one of those times, for you and for me.
The dream house will get built just like you’ll write the next chapter in the incredible story of your life. And when these things are almost complete, we’ll catch ourselves looking off into the distance for the next thing that will both frustrate and satisfy us. It’s who you are, it’s who I love so very much.